Sorry

Some of you have been e-mailing me wondering where I am, so I guess it’s about time that I told you.  I’m not dead, but I saw him again.  I had to leave.  I can’t handle this anymore.

I honestly have no idea what I’m doing or where I’m going.  I’m back to running but it seems like there’s nowhere to run this time.  None of the friends I made before have contacted me back.  I tried to go home, but my parents aren’t in the house I grew up in, and the people that live in the house now have no idea where they went.  You should have seen their faces, they thought I was a nut.  I didn’t even know what to sao, I justturned an dleft.  I’m headed up the west coast, maybe I’ll stop somewhere ein Washington.  It depends on when I stop seeing him, I guess. 

All I know anymore is driving, and even that is becoming scarily unfamiliar to me.  Sometimes, I’ll wake up on the side of the highway, fifty yards from my car, or in a state I don’t remember entering, or fucking days after the last date I remember.  I try not to sleep anymore, but sometime sit has to happen and that’s even worse, I’m always dreaming about those same girls.  I  hate dreaming about those girls.  I feel really bad for them, and more and more I’m believing that they’re actually real people that are going through something similar to what I’m going through.  I want to find them, but I don’t have full names.  I really am trying, though…I really want to help them.  Maybe we can help each other. 

I’m in Keno, Oregon right now, trying to get my shit together.  I’ll try to update more frequently for those of you who are watching.

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